I never know if what the people at the office say is really true. When you hear "Oh, WOW! Things are looking really really good", you're not sure if that's the standard line of if things really are looking really really good. Like the sales girl telling me I look great in those $100 jeans when I know full well my cheeks look like canned hams hoping to be released for dinner. It's frustrating for a person, like myself, who wants the truth, even if it is not the best news. At least that would help prepare for the worst while hoping for the best.....
That's what they said at my appointment yesterday. Things are looking really really good. I have 20 follies ranging from 20-24, and a few more ranging from 15-19. Sounds pretty effin good to me, but now's the time the self-preserving doubt mode kicks in. No one likes to be disappointed. Least of all when you've already experienced this specific disappointment before.
The hope creeps in and the hope creeps out; the hope creeps in and shakes your heart about. You do the IVF and it turns your world around; That's what it's all about!
Took my trigger shot last night at EXACTLY 9:30PM as directed. Was hoping to skip the Ganirelix shot but no such luck. Also still taking the antibiotic, which I have come to realize makes me nauseous no matter how or when I take it. With food, without, water, soda- you get the picture. Blechhh.....
Egg retrieval is tomorrow at 7:AM. I get to pop a valium tonight before bed, then another 30 minutes before scheduled procedure time. That should help calm my jittery nerves. Hubby proposed we split them. No freakin way. There are few perks to this process and this sounds like one of them, so I am definitely. not. sharing.
On a completely different note, we visited our old house today. We sold it about a month ago and I was friendly with the new owner. We moved to an apartment literally 4 blocks away, so I told her if she needed anything to let us know. We went over to show her how to backwash the pool, operate the sprinkler timer, what plants were what, etc.
I was worried it would be sad to see our old house. I have a tendency to have problems letting things go. This was not one of those occasions.
The first thing to hit us was the smell. Cigarettes, dog, moth balls, and wierd storage smell. She's smoking in my house!!! EEEEWWWWW!
I had never realized how much our senses contribute to our daily existence. That a funky smell could wipe away and trace of the bond I had with my house! It's not MY house anymore, it's HER stinky house. It looks the same. She hasn't painted anything. But it's just so different. I was glad because I realized I was able to let go of some things ~ they just have to be stinky (0:
I'll update after the surgery, probably Sunday. I am SO going to milk every moment from now until then. I figure with all I have to deal with, my hubby can suck up waiting on my ass. After all, I am a princess!