Cars with no engines. Tweenkies with no filling.

Went to the dr on Thursday for a follow-up. I was looking for some more concrete answers then the same ol' "we'll see how it goes" crap. This time I walked in knowing I was not leaving until I got the dr to give me a real opinion. He was receptive and open. Went through the entire cycle.

18 eggs retrieved, 15 mature. All hormone levels normal. Wonderful stim. Embie dr watches all the eggs, including immature. Puts immature in dish and surrounds with sperm just to see what happens. One of my 3 fertilized. So we're at 16 ebies to start.
And that's where it all goes to shit.

Embies are supposed to divide and multiply. Mine seem to have missed that memo. Most stalled quickly, around the 4 cell mark. The "good" one implanted was a 16 cell, however, it jumped from 4-16 and kinda missed the 8 point, which is abnormal. Other two "best" embies were 7 cell, which is pretty dismal as they should have at least been at 8.

SO WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME IS THAT MY EGGS ARE BAD?
Well, not bad exactly, but obviously abnormal. They appear to be missing the mechanism that encourages the cell division necessary for growth.

IS THERE ANY WAY TO CORRECT THIS?
No.

WHAT ARE MY OPTIONS?
We could continue to try IVF in the hopes that there is one good egg in there, but to be honest, it doesn't look good. You could opt for a donor egg, however, this will be quite expensive and there are no guarantees. There is quite a waiting list for donor eggs as we speak. If you had your own sponsor, you could get started a lot sooner, and it would mediate the cost of buying someone's eggs, but you're still faced with a large expense and there are no guarantees that would lead to a successful pregnancy. There is a chance that your entire reproductive system is compromised, which would explain the continual production of abnormal eggs.

And that's it. Game over. Rotten eggs. Who'd have thought? I mean, I read about abnormal hormone levels, low sperm counts, bad stimulation....... the list goes on. But I have NEVER heard of rotten eggs. I had a guess since both rounds of IVF were similar with everything hunky dory until the ICSI part; But it's another thing entirely to hear it out loud. Loud like a door slamming. Bomb exploding. Hope being shattered like a million pieces of glass. My heart breaking.