tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post391605449843471746..comments2014-08-07T14:16:19.404-07:00Comments on The Princess Shine Pages: woe is meAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06477543108055597027noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-28570470003102619182008-07-08T14:36:00.000-07:002008-07-08T14:36:00.000-07:00It's DEFINITLY a balancing act of not being a pain...It's DEFINITLY a balancing act of not being a pain in the butt foster mom but also sticking up for foster baby. I try so hard not to be annoying but also to protect little J.Patyrishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02001544727042582614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-55845014681996092322008-06-02T22:46:00.000-07:002008-06-02T22:46:00.000-07:00I hear you about being the protective parent and b...I hear you about being the protective parent and being tuned out. I heard it from the CPS worker about my children's former foster parents. (We did foster adopt) Boy, am I grateful that they pushed so hard for the girls. Sadly though, they pushed too hard, and now I am told from the worker that they won't be getting anymore children -because they weren't compliant enough. <BR/>I too, suggested changes in visitations with family. At times that were convenient for the children - as opposed to the workers and family. Avoiding nap time - taking the kids to a park next door instead of a office room with worn out toys under florescent lights. Keep up the fight. Tread lightly and take care of yourself. Each child comes to your care as a learning experience. Your time will come - keep the faith.Mommy of 5https://www.blogger.com/profile/14255696004500368773noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-89429128494411719262008-05-05T15:58:00.000-07:002008-05-05T15:58:00.000-07:00Just stopped by to check in and see how you are do...Just stopped by to check in and see how you are doing :)OHNhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03856294075428012923noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-65432774363072204082008-05-02T14:56:00.000-07:002008-05-02T14:56:00.000-07:00What I think about the foster care system, I canno...What I think about the foster care system, I cannot put into words. Some things work, some things don't. And I'll stop there.<BR/><BR/>What I take from reading this post is that we are lucky to have done foster care in the county we reside.<BR/><BR/>What the hell is wrong with these social workers?? (Can you hear my keys banging???) I know from experience that they act in a possessive manner about the children on their caseload and that there is a fine line between caring for a child and over involvement (but it's important to love and bond with the child you have, just not too much...yeah, yeah, yeah) in the eyes of the worker.<BR/><BR/>They are supposed to support reunification and the needs of the child. Tell me please, how is it in Sweet Pea's best interest to bond with a new caregiver and then be abandoned by said caregiver when they visit with bio family? At nap time!!<BR/><BR/>Perhaps a course in child development would help these social workers.<BR/><BR/>This is clearly not a case of an over involved foster parent.Triciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14581392888793642746noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-5689709122286582432008-04-30T17:34:00.000-07:002008-04-30T17:34:00.000-07:00I would love to personally restructure the entire ...I would love to personally restructure the entire system. It is one of those plans that is supposed to create happiness and yet it seems to make so many peoples lives sad and disconnected. From the child placed (sometimes several places) to the family that craves to nurture and raise that child, to the people that think that biology rules above common sense. Sometimes I want to smack someone upside the head and wake them up. <BR/><BR/>I hope this gets easier for you. It has to be very very difficult being in the middle.OHNhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03856294075428012923noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-39932708745628095492008-04-29T21:09:00.000-07:002008-04-29T21:09:00.000-07:00Hard to balance. Your needs should count, too. B...Hard to balance. Your needs should count, too. But obviously, so must everyone else's. I can't answer whether foster care is the best thing or not, but I'm wishing you the strength and wisdom to answer that question for yourself.<BR/><BR/>BeaBeahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11877513815828460269noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-80105873381503681672008-04-29T05:19:00.000-07:002008-04-29T05:19:00.000-07:00You've brought up an issue I've been puzzled about...You've brought up an issue I've been puzzled about for years. Here in Australia we don't have your system of foster-to-adopt. In fact, when new carers are being trained it is emphasised that this is not the way to grow a family, and couples with fertility issues are often advised to reconsider fostering, because the initial plan for children coming into care is always reunification. Yes, down the track, after months or more likely years of failed attempts at reunification, the foster family usually have the opportunity to take on long-term care (legal guardianship but not usually adoption) of the child, but in the meantime the foster carer is expected to work hard at sending the child home. I can't see how anyone can do that, when their greatest wish is to have that child for ever. My heart is with you Steph, as it was when your last little one went home to Grandma (as my little Angel looks like doing soon). You tread a difficult path.Janinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11947647228190199276noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-36410000748478097522008-04-28T12:14:00.000-07:002008-04-28T12:14:00.000-07:00I have never done foster care - I am not sure I ha...I have never done foster care - I am not sure I have the heart for it. I did one foster type situation a few year back and even now my heart breaks when I think of that little boy and how much I miss him. I don't think I would be functioning if I had to do it again. <BR/>I am an adoptive mom. I just want to say that while I do not think I could do what you do, I am in such awe of the people who have the courage to do it. This little guy is benefiting tremendously from what you are giving him, his life will forever be better because of you. No matter the outcome. <BR/>I wanted to suggest (and please forgive me if I am out of line) maybe you could consider other adoption avenues, while still doing the foster to adopt program. This way you could continue to do the good you are doing, leave yourself open to completing an adoption with this (or any other child), while still being able to parent without the more emotional difficulties.Upstatemammahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16862359333933751151noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-55644691996902039862008-04-28T10:24:00.000-07:002008-04-28T10:24:00.000-07:00I can't imagine how difficult it would be, especia...I can't imagine how difficult it would be, especially when you're hoping to adopt. I know I would quickly get attached to a child and it would be heart-breaking to give them up, especially if I knew where they were going and wasn't happy about it.<BR/><BR/>It sounds like you've got some things to think about. Good luck with that.hope548https://www.blogger.com/profile/11951199252401108222noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33129994.post-10072972430059667712008-04-26T19:29:00.000-07:002008-04-26T19:29:00.000-07:00I don't have a better solution, but foster-adopt s...I don't have a better solution, but foster-adopt sometimes seems to me to be the worst idea ever. What is asked of foster parents is just impossible. When else do we ask people to work contrary to their motivations for being involved in a task?Yondallahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10375966725096729570noreply@blogger.com